When you look up hubris in the dictionary...

I'm pretty sure you'll see my picture. I've started knitting a sweater.

Some of you may recall the rather, er, painful experience I had with my first sweater. But undeterred (or, only deterred for three years*), I've started another sweater.

This sweater, the Providence Hoodie, from New England Knits.

Let's look at the series of mistakes I've already made:

1. I read the instructions and thought "Hey, I can totally knit this! It's actually really easy!"

2. I knit and blocked a huge swatch - IN PATTERN - and got gauge bang-on, with the recommended needle size. Given how tightly I knit, this is a clear violation of all the laws of physics and/or an especially cruel joke.

3. The knitting is going really well. I've finished the bottom cable band, about the equivalent of half a cabled scarf (I hate knitting scarves). And I'm thoroughly enjoying every single damn stitch.

4. The friend I'm knitting it for loves it, too. She named the swatch ("Swatchy"), and carried it around with her all day when I showed it to her. She's also received periodic photo updates on the cabling and remains madly in love with it.

See what I mean? I think we can all expect an especially spectacular fuck-up any day now. Because the knitting gods surely will not stand for this.

* Jesus, I'm a pussy.